As I have mentioned before my 1-year-old daughter, Arlet, has Down syndrome.
Before I proceed, yes my husband and I knew this before we adopted her and we would not trade her for the world. She is the happiest baby I know with a smile that can light up anyone's day and the biggest most beautiful brown eyes.
Each person with Down syndrome is different, but along with Down syndrome usually comes a variety of medical issues, both physically and mentally, that in-the-end affect each person developmentally.
One of the scariest health issues that comes along with this condition is heart problems. In fact, recent studies show that between 40-60% of children with Down syndrome have a variety of heart issues.
That is a lot of children.
Especially to a mother who worries every day for her little girl, hoping that she will grow up healthy and happy; with boundless and endless opportunities; with the ability to grow up and have a normal life, which includes a marriage a family; and that her syndrome never gets in the way of my baby's life.
And unfortunately, Arlet has a heart condition.
It is very small and minor, but to a mother it is anything but that; it is serious, scary, and stressful.
Luckily, it was caught early and Arlet is very young so she can recover quickly, but until my daughter has the operation to correct the issue and makes a full and healthy recovery, I will be a scared and a nervous wreck.
And yes, that is right, I said surgery. The s-word that no parent ever wants their child to experience. Even if it isn't as bad as it sounds.
So in exactly two weeks Wren and I will be driving our darling daughter to the hospital to have heart surgery. Arlet has a PDA (patent ductus arteriosus) which translates as a congenial heart disease that creates a dangerous connection between the aorta and the pulmonary artery in the heart. This needs to be corrected immediately to ensure 1) faster recovery and 2) as great health for our little girl as possible.
So we're preparing. We're preparing with doctors appointments, tons of prayer, hugs, family and friend support, and a lot more.
Because it's not easy.
And i'm scared. Very scared.
While I know the chance is miniscule that there will be complications, I cannot help but worry for my little girl because I love her so much. And that's what you do when you love someone, you worry.
And in the mean time, as usual, Arlet is happy and giggles and smiles as usual!
For some reason I have this feeling that she will go into the operating room in happy spirits full of glee with the biggest smile on her face.
That's my girl!
And I love her so much!
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Sunday, April 7, 2013
A Marriage FAQ
April 17th marks nine years that
Wren and I have been married. In honor of this celebratory date, I will be
posting quite a few blog posts centered around our marriage and the love we
share for each other. Next up: a marriage FAQ.
***
How did you meet your husband?I met Wren by coincidence when I was 17-years-old and he was 20-years-old. He came to my house to collect a check from my father, but my father was running late from a business meeting so I kept him company. We got into talking and discovered we had a lot in common. When it was time for Wren to leave he left and we didn't stay in contact for a couple months. Then, four months later, he called me and asked me out. Turns out he left his phone number on the receipt my dad had and my dad thought I knew about it and didn't bring it up to me! I said yes and we went on our first date three days later, and about every three days after that for six months until Wren proposed! We were married six months later on April 17th, 2004 and it has been a true fairytale since the day I met my Prince Charming. When you met him, did you have any idea that you would marry him?
I met Wren one day and didn't see him for three months after that, so yes I did feel an attraction to him but it quickly faded. Once he called me and asked me on a date, though, and I heard his voice on the phone I was reminded once again why I liked this man: there was something about him that made me feel special and happy. After our first date, Wren kissed my on the cheek and as he drove away, I knew I was in love with this man that he would one day be my husband. As cheesy as it may sound, it was definitely love at first sight for Wren and me. Whenever I was with Wren I didn't want to leave him and whenever I wasn't with him I couldn't wait to be with him again. And I remember after our first date telling my mom, "I just know it, Mom, this is the man i'm going to marry." Our love was that real and our connection was that instant.
On some level, you essentially "grew up" along side of your husband. What have been the challenges that accompany that? Benefits?
Wren and I met and began a life together when we were very young, so it is correct that we grew up and matured together. There were definitely some struggles we faced, especially when we married because we had to go from kids to adults overnight. Suddenly there were questions like how are we going to pay the bills? and how are we going to balance college, work, and our marriage? But the beauty of this is that I wasn't alone or Wren wasn't alone, we were going through our struggles together as a team, as husband and wife, as one. And these struggles only brought us closer because they tested our marriage, tested our faith, and tested our honesty; but our struggles never tested our love and commitment to one another, though. The benefits definitely include having a strong marriage (because of all the conflicts we went through in the beginning), maturing faster, having more memories and years spent together, and so much more.
When did you two move in together? When did you get engaged and married?
Wren and I were engaged after exactly six months of courtship and married on our one year anniversary. It was on our wedding night that we moved in together. Many people find two things strange about this: 1) that we married so soon AND 2) that we moved in together after marriage (not before). Firstly, we were young and in-love and knew that marriage was the best step for our relationship. Secondly, Wren and I are strong believers that certain things should be saved for marriage, and one of those things is waiting until marriage to share a bedroom. That is what marriage is designed for and it has made our marriage so much more special.
Did your family and friends ever encourage you to date other people or slow down your relationship?
No, fortunately both sides of our family have been very supportive of our relationship from the very beginning. It is evident to them how in love we are in-love with each other and have done everything to encourage our courtship and help our marriage from the very beginning. Maybe it's because both of our parents married young, maybe not, but we're very lucky to have such supporting, encouraging parents.
Do you think you missed anything by not dating heaps of people?
What is there to miss? I am very lucky to have found my soul mate at a very young age; someone who is nice, smart, loving, etc.. Meeting Wren saved me from a lot: heartbreak, a bad relationship, an experience with a bad guy, and more. So did I miss anything? No, I don't believe so.
The vast majority of relationships that begin at 17 do not end in marriage- despite what we may believe when we are 16. What advice may you give somebody who is interested in a long term relationship with someone they started dating while they were young?
The first and biggest piece of advice is to never give up. I know couples who go from so in-love to absolutely hating each other, and they are frustrated and hopeless so they do not work on their marriage. But if you don't work on your marriage how can you fix it? Also, make your marriage a priority everyday. Don't put your relationship off to the side because you have kids or because you are too tired to spend time together. Wren and I do this by spending at least an hour of alone time every day together; and even though it usually happens once the kids go bed it is so special for our relationship. Sometimes i'll wait and eat dinner with Wren once he comes home from work and the kids are asleep; other times we'll stay up late and read in bed together; sometimes we'll watch a movie together, it just depends. Also, kiss your husband good morning and goodnight everyday, and never go to bed angry with each other.
Saturday, April 6, 2013
Our Love Story (Part 1)
April 17th marks nine years that Wren and I have been married. In honor of this celebratory date, I will be posting quite a few blog posts centered around our marriage and the love we share for each other. First up: how we met.
***
Wren and I met in 2003 at my
parent’s home in Provo, Utah. I was seventeen-years-old at the time, and was
preparing to graduate from high school in the following weeks. On that very
sunny day, Wren- who worked for his mother’s bookstore- came to collect money
from my parents for a book my father bought at her store. My parents had gone
out for lunch, which left me home alone for the afternoon. To make matters
worse, Wren was a day early and neither of my parents had warned me he
was coming ahead of schedule. At 1pm the door rang. I ran to answer it, not sure
who it could be. It was Sunday, which meant all the mailmen and delivery men
were off, and no one in my family ever bothered to knock, they just came on in.
So imagine my surprise when I, dressed in my pink polk-a-dot flannels with messy hair, walked down stairs and opened the door to a very handsome man standing in the
doorway. I was shocked, dumbfounded for that matter, at not only my appearance,
but at the man that was standing at my doorstep.
“Hello, I’m Wren Kingston… from Cozy Corner Books. I’m
here to collect a check for a book bought by someone at this address,” said a 5’11
man, about my age, with curly, dark brown hair and green eyes in a very
charming voice. I invited him to come inside while I called my father to ask him about the check. Admittedly, while I was on the phone with him, I brushed my teeth and combed my hair- attempting to present myself a bit nicer. Then I went downstairs and brought him a glass of water. It was no doubt that he was hot from these late summer temperatures. “My dad forgot you were coming today. He’s sorry. He’s going to pay the bill at the restaurant he’s eating at right now, then head on over. He said you can wait here. It shouldn’t take more than twenty minutes,” I said. Please stay. Please stay, I thought to myself, Who are you? How haven’t I met you before?
To my wishes, he stayed. We got into talking while he sat and waited for my father. As it turns out, we had A LOT in common. We both come from medium/largish sized families (he has four brothers, I have four sisters), we are both Mormon (that’s a big “shocker” considering we lived in Provo), and we were both either done with high school or about to graduate. Wren, who had just returned from a 2-year mission in South Africa, had also gone to the same (very large) high school that I went to, but graduated two years before me. He said he’d heard of me, and even remembered me from the yearbook, and I was very sad I couldn’t say the same. It then came up that we were both single, but we quickly changed the conversation to something else.
Thirty minutes later, my dad arrived home, paid Wren, and then went to his office to work, unaware that I had just met the man of my dreams. I was a little bit sad that the one person who made my weekend interesting was leaving- especially because there was so much we had in common- but I quickly walked him to the door and said goodbye.
It wasn’t until he left that this wave of feeling had entered my body, telling me that this guy was special, and that I’d possibly want to see more of him. I thought about him for the rest of the day, smiling over the details of the day we shared, but questioning if I’d ever see him again. I wanted to call him, but decided not to make the first move. If Wren has any interest in me, he will make the first move, I thought to myself, secretly hoping that he would indeed make the first move.
But he didn’t. He never called. I was gloomy for the first couple of days after our first initial meeting, but quickly forgot about him and continued with life as normal. Then one day, that all changed. It was my sister's birthday, and everyone had gathered at my home to celebrate. We were eating cake and all sharing our favorite childhood memory we shared with my sister, when the phone rang… it was for me.
“Who is it”, I asked my older sister who had answered the phone.
“Well, well, well! It’s someone named Wren,” she said in a teasing voice, “Who is this Wren we have never heard anything about?” And then, right then, I knew asking her who was on the phone was a big mistake. Immediately all my family and friends gathered around the phone, teasing me and making jokes.
“Oh, it’s… it’s no one,” I said, “I’ll just take this call in my room!” I took the phone to my room, thank goodness for the invention of cordless phones, and nervously sat down on my bed. I know one Wren, I thought to myself, Please be who I think this who I think it is!
“Hello”, I said.
“Hi Laura, its Wren. Remember me? I came to your house to pick up a check about two months ago.” Yes, I thought to myself, it's him!
“Yes, I remember. Hi.”
“Well listen, I just wanted to know if you’d like to go on a date with me. I know you never called me back, but…”
“What do you mean”, I said in a concerned voice, “I never called you back because I never got a call from you.”
“I left my number on the receipt, and just wanted to make sure everything was okay. It seemed like we really had chemistry.”
“I thought so too. And I’m sorry, I never looked at the receipt after you left. I just sat it on my dad’s desk. But now that I have your number, I don’t have to worry about finding it.”
“Oh, that's okay. Well, what do you say? Monday night, 8 o’clock?”
“That would be nice. I’ll see you then. Byeeee,” I said, trying to hide the fact that I was over-the-moon excited. After I got off the phone, I went to find my dad to ask him about the receipt, one that could have gotten me a date with Richard weeks ago.
“Dad,” I said, after finding him in our home library reading a book. “Did you happen to find a receipt with a phone number… about two months ago?”
“By a matter of fact, Laura, I did. It was from Cozy Corner Books.”
“Yes dad, well why didn’t you give it to me?”
As it turns out, he thought I already knew about the cellphone number on the receipt, and as the good dad that he is, he ignored it and had trust in the decision I was going to make. How could I get made at that?
For the next couple of days I anxiously anticipated our first date and could not wait until October 6th when I'd finally get to see Wren again.
Next up: our first date...
Saturday, March 30, 2013
An Update
Wow! I cannot believe it has been almost one month since Gabriella's birth. Times are flying and she is growing, growing, growing whether I like it or not... and trust me, I don't like it!
Gabriella is a great eater and wakes up every hour on the hour to eat… no joke! Her sisters and brothers love her and all they want to do is hold her, kiss her, and make her smile… though we all know she can’t even smile yet! Her personality has definitely been showing, even at a few weeks old! I think she’s going to have a bit of attitude and toughness in her, but also a girly side. She’s feisty and not very patient, and the girly side is just a guess... probably because I love dressing her in pink, frilly outfits!
Gabriella loves her new brothers and sisters, and they love her. Each child is adjusting well to their new sister and enjoy playing and helping with her. Speaking of the kids, here is an update about how each child is doing since Gabriella joined our family:
Maya, who has done the whole big sister thing six other times, is yet again a wonderful big sister, which comes to no surprise. She is always by my side, helping me with whatever is needed and tries to finish her schoolwork and other responsibilities early everyday so she can help feed, change, play, and watch Gabriella. And trust me, I love and use any help I can get!
This is probably the first time Amari and Kenyan have been so excited for a new baby. It's not that they weren't excited when Gianna, Ira, Elaina, or Arlet joined our family, but they were a lot younger then and didn't quite grasp the concept of a new baby. But now they do, and cannot get enough of their little sister. Amari and Kenyan are perfect for hugging, kissing, and holding Gabriella because they cannot get enough of her. Kenyan isn't into changing or feeding Gabriella, but he loves to play with her. Amari, on the other hand, loves to change and feed Gabriella, and actually prefers this to playing with her. Maybe because she cannot actually play yet.
Gianna is a great big sister and I can already tell that she is going to have a special bond and close relationship with Gabriella. She is already talking about sharing a bedroom with her little sister and what she is going to teach her when she is older. It melts my heart and is one of my favorite things about having a lot of children: my kids love each other so much!
Ira is also a wonderful and amazing big sister. She is still a little bummed that she didn't get a baby brother like she hoped, but still loves her sister just as much and is slowly warming up to Gabriella. There have been a few moments of jealousy, but that is to be expected. The cutest thing she has said since the birth of Gabriella is "Gabi, I am your big sister and I will always love you. I will buy you candy when you're older and sing you songs and read you stories." It was priceless!
Elaina, at two years old, has been the entertainer when it comes to Gabriella. As she is so young she isn't very interesting in caring for her sister yet, but she loves to perform for her by singing and dancing. That is no surprise, though, considering Elaina's HUGE personality. I'm pretty sure I have a future actress on my hands! But there have been a few times of sisterly bonding between the two of them; like how Elaina insists on picking out her outfits every morning, or how she likes to (gently) comb through her baby sister's wild hair!
Last but not least, Little Miss A (Arlet) has done surprisingly well as a big sister. She doesn't mind sharing my attention and always wants to be in the same room as her baby sister. When Gabriella is crying, Arlet is the first one to get my attention and she leads me to whichever room Gabriella is in. She also loves to climb in her sister's crib and pretend she is the baby. I love seeing her as a big sister!
I am We are so in love with Gabriella. She has brought so much joy and happiness to our family and I cannot imagine life without her.
Wow, eight kids! How lucky am I?
Gabriella is a great eater and wakes up every hour on the hour to eat… no joke! Her sisters and brothers love her and all they want to do is hold her, kiss her, and make her smile… though we all know she can’t even smile yet! Her personality has definitely been showing, even at a few weeks old! I think she’s going to have a bit of attitude and toughness in her, but also a girly side. She’s feisty and not very patient, and the girly side is just a guess... probably because I love dressing her in pink, frilly outfits!
Gabriella loves her new brothers and sisters, and they love her. Each child is adjusting well to their new sister and enjoy playing and helping with her. Speaking of the kids, here is an update about how each child is doing since Gabriella joined our family:
Maya, who has done the whole big sister thing six other times, is yet again a wonderful big sister, which comes to no surprise. She is always by my side, helping me with whatever is needed and tries to finish her schoolwork and other responsibilities early everyday so she can help feed, change, play, and watch Gabriella. And trust me, I love and use any help I can get!
This is probably the first time Amari and Kenyan have been so excited for a new baby. It's not that they weren't excited when Gianna, Ira, Elaina, or Arlet joined our family, but they were a lot younger then and didn't quite grasp the concept of a new baby. But now they do, and cannot get enough of their little sister. Amari and Kenyan are perfect for hugging, kissing, and holding Gabriella because they cannot get enough of her. Kenyan isn't into changing or feeding Gabriella, but he loves to play with her. Amari, on the other hand, loves to change and feed Gabriella, and actually prefers this to playing with her. Maybe because she cannot actually play yet.
Gianna is a great big sister and I can already tell that she is going to have a special bond and close relationship with Gabriella. She is already talking about sharing a bedroom with her little sister and what she is going to teach her when she is older. It melts my heart and is one of my favorite things about having a lot of children: my kids love each other so much!
Ira is also a wonderful and amazing big sister. She is still a little bummed that she didn't get a baby brother like she hoped, but still loves her sister just as much and is slowly warming up to Gabriella. There have been a few moments of jealousy, but that is to be expected. The cutest thing she has said since the birth of Gabriella is "Gabi, I am your big sister and I will always love you. I will buy you candy when you're older and sing you songs and read you stories." It was priceless!
Elaina, at two years old, has been the entertainer when it comes to Gabriella. As she is so young she isn't very interesting in caring for her sister yet, but she loves to perform for her by singing and dancing. That is no surprise, though, considering Elaina's HUGE personality. I'm pretty sure I have a future actress on my hands! But there have been a few times of sisterly bonding between the two of them; like how Elaina insists on picking out her outfits every morning, or how she likes to (gently) comb through her baby sister's wild hair!
Last but not least, Little Miss A (Arlet) has done surprisingly well as a big sister. She doesn't mind sharing my attention and always wants to be in the same room as her baby sister. When Gabriella is crying, Arlet is the first one to get my attention and she leads me to whichever room Gabriella is in. She also loves to climb in her sister's crib and pretend she is the baby. I love seeing her as a big sister!
Wow, eight kids! How lucky am I?
Friday, March 29, 2013
Gabriella's Birth Story
Gabriella is my eighth child. Four of my children joined our family through the miracle of adoption, while four are biological, making Gabriella my fourth pregnancy. My four pregnancies were all relatively easy. I had morning sickness, but only until 12 weeks; I never craved anything unhealthy, only fruits and vegetables; and I wasn't in a lot of pain, just very tired. But i'll take being tired over morning sickness, crazy cravings, and body pain any day! With my three previous pregnancies, I delivered sometime between 38 and 41 weeks, so there really was no way to be certain when i'd deliver this time around. I just had to live day by day and know that I could deliver that day, the next day, or two weeks from then.
March 6th began like any other day. I woke up exhausted from a terrible night's sleep, dressed and fed seven children, shuffled the five oldest to the dentist, stopped by the library, went back home and began school for the day, made lunch, dealt with what is for sure our biggest tantrum of the year (so far), took a nap, and then handed the kids off to Wren when he came home from work at 6pm. Dinner wasn't made and the house was a mess, but I was too tired to do anything. "They're all yours," I said before retreating to my sanctuary- my bedroom- for another long nap.
I woke up around 9pm. A three hour nap- wow! Wren was asleep next to me and, when I got out of bed, I discovered that all seven children were sound asleep, a healthy dinner had been made, and Wren had tidied up the house. No wonder he was asleep at such an early hour!
Suddenly I felt pressure in my stomach. A few hours earlier a sharp pain had run through my stomach but I dismissed it as a coincidence because it didn't return. But now I began wondering: was I in labor? I wasn't sure if it was a false alarm or the real thing, so I decided to not wake up Wren. He had been working so hard lately, caring for me and the children, working a demanding job, and keeping up with all of my usual responsibilities, so I didn't want to wake him up if it was only a false alarm. That had been happening so many times during the last month of my pregnancy, and Wren even began to call me "the girl who cried wolf." Time would definitely tell within the next couple of hours whether I was in labor or not.
In the meantime, the pain kept coming... and intensifying every so often. It was so bad that I couldn't fall back asleep, so until I could make the determination of whether I was in false labor or real labor, I entered nesting mode. It was only 9pm, after all. I had the whole night to nest, nest, nest! So from 9ish at night to 3ish in the morning I did what any other 9-month pregnant woman on the verge of labor and delivery would do: I organized the pantry, unfolded and folded the baby's clothing, did laundry, and even cooked the next night's supper. All while the pain kept coming and coming. In fact, my experience reminded me of the song "She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain" but instead for me it was "She'll be Nesting 'Round the House as she Labors!"
I still couldn't make the determination of whether I was in labor or not, though. I would have just dismissed my pain for false labor and gone back to bed if it weren't for the pain that kept intensifying every hour. So around 3am I decided to text my sister and see if she wanted to go running. If six hours of nonstop cleaning wouldn't do the trick, running a couple miles most definitely should, right? My sister said yes and from 4am to 5am we went running around the neighborhood.
Okay, I'll try to stop rambling and get on with the part to when I began laboring, alright? Where was I? Oh...
FINALLY, when I was in the middle of my run, my water broke! I knew I wasn't crazy, I really was in labor. So we went back to the house and I woke Wren up, "honey, my water broke. We need to head to the hospital." My husband, who mind you is the hardest person to wake up and get out of bed, repeated what he has done with my three previous deliveries: he enters crazy man mode. "What? What? WHAT?! Labor? We're having a baby? Okay, let's go!" and he runs to the car with the hospital bag and forgets the most important detail: his pregnant wife and unborn child. Luckily, he only made it to the car and then remembered me... not like Gianna where he actually forgot me!
We arrived to the hospital a short time later. It was now 6:15am and I could tell the baby was going to come very, very soon. (Side note: So funny how my labor compares to life. One minute things are fine and calm, and the next minute there is hecticness and a conflict.) Wren and I, along with a couple of nurses, rushed to my birthing room on the labor and delivery floor of our local hospital. I got all situated- filled out paperwork, changed into a birthing gown, got hooked up to an IV (ouch!), and got as comfortable in bed as I could. We met with my doctor, Dr. Rashad, and discovered I was 8 centimeters dilated.
No wonder it hurt so bad.
An ways, for the next hour I patiently (I call it patiently, Wren calls it impatiently) waited to get to 10 centimeters. The time finally came and at about 8am I began pushing. It hurt so bad! Payback for such a wonderful, smooth, easy pregnancy... that I am sure of.
I pushed for about 20 minutes.
Pushed. Painfully.
And pushed. Excruciatingly.
And pushed. Agonizingly.
Finally, her head appeared. A head full of dark, beautiful hair.
Next came her shoulders. Small and tiny, very petite.
Then, her body. Thin and slender, the perfect size.
And finally, out she came!
"It's a GIRL," Wren cried, "a beautiful baby girl!"
Right onto Mommy's chest she went for a couple minutes of family time with me and Wren. We held her. We cried with her. And we couldn't believe that this baby is ours. How lucky are we? Truly lucky. She is beautiful and is the perfect combination of Wren, myself, and her brothers and sisters. Her name is Gabriella Lynette. Gabriella is a name I have loved all my life, and now the name belongs to a perfect little love of mine. Her middle name, Lynette, is after Wren's childhood nanny, a woman he admires and adores. Gabriella came home the very next day to a house full of love, where she is loved and adored. We cannot imagine life without our little beauty and cannot wait to see what life has in store for our amazing daughter.
Mommy and Daddy love you, Gabriella!
March 6th began like any other day. I woke up exhausted from a terrible night's sleep, dressed and fed seven children, shuffled the five oldest to the dentist, stopped by the library, went back home and began school for the day, made lunch, dealt with what is for sure our biggest tantrum of the year (so far), took a nap, and then handed the kids off to Wren when he came home from work at 6pm. Dinner wasn't made and the house was a mess, but I was too tired to do anything. "They're all yours," I said before retreating to my sanctuary- my bedroom- for another long nap.
I woke up around 9pm. A three hour nap- wow! Wren was asleep next to me and, when I got out of bed, I discovered that all seven children were sound asleep, a healthy dinner had been made, and Wren had tidied up the house. No wonder he was asleep at such an early hour!
Suddenly I felt pressure in my stomach. A few hours earlier a sharp pain had run through my stomach but I dismissed it as a coincidence because it didn't return. But now I began wondering: was I in labor? I wasn't sure if it was a false alarm or the real thing, so I decided to not wake up Wren. He had been working so hard lately, caring for me and the children, working a demanding job, and keeping up with all of my usual responsibilities, so I didn't want to wake him up if it was only a false alarm. That had been happening so many times during the last month of my pregnancy, and Wren even began to call me "the girl who cried wolf." Time would definitely tell within the next couple of hours whether I was in labor or not.
In the meantime, the pain kept coming... and intensifying every so often. It was so bad that I couldn't fall back asleep, so until I could make the determination of whether I was in false labor or real labor, I entered nesting mode. It was only 9pm, after all. I had the whole night to nest, nest, nest! So from 9ish at night to 3ish in the morning I did what any other 9-month pregnant woman on the verge of labor and delivery would do: I organized the pantry, unfolded and folded the baby's clothing, did laundry, and even cooked the next night's supper. All while the pain kept coming and coming. In fact, my experience reminded me of the song "She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain" but instead for me it was "She'll be Nesting 'Round the House as she Labors!"
I still couldn't make the determination of whether I was in labor or not, though. I would have just dismissed my pain for false labor and gone back to bed if it weren't for the pain that kept intensifying every hour. So around 3am I decided to text my sister and see if she wanted to go running. If six hours of nonstop cleaning wouldn't do the trick, running a couple miles most definitely should, right? My sister said yes and from 4am to 5am we went running around the neighborhood.
Okay, I'll try to stop rambling and get on with the part to when I began laboring, alright? Where was I? Oh...
FINALLY, when I was in the middle of my run, my water broke! I knew I wasn't crazy, I really was in labor. So we went back to the house and I woke Wren up, "honey, my water broke. We need to head to the hospital." My husband, who mind you is the hardest person to wake up and get out of bed, repeated what he has done with my three previous deliveries: he enters crazy man mode. "What? What? WHAT?! Labor? We're having a baby? Okay, let's go!" and he runs to the car with the hospital bag and forgets the most important detail: his pregnant wife and unborn child. Luckily, he only made it to the car and then remembered me... not like Gianna where he actually forgot me!
We arrived to the hospital a short time later. It was now 6:15am and I could tell the baby was going to come very, very soon. (Side note: So funny how my labor compares to life. One minute things are fine and calm, and the next minute there is hecticness and a conflict.) Wren and I, along with a couple of nurses, rushed to my birthing room on the labor and delivery floor of our local hospital. I got all situated- filled out paperwork, changed into a birthing gown, got hooked up to an IV (ouch!), and got as comfortable in bed as I could. We met with my doctor, Dr. Rashad, and discovered I was 8 centimeters dilated.
No wonder it hurt so bad.
An ways, for the next hour I patiently (I call it patiently, Wren calls it impatiently) waited to get to 10 centimeters. The time finally came and at about 8am I began pushing. It hurt so bad! Payback for such a wonderful, smooth, easy pregnancy... that I am sure of.
I pushed for about 20 minutes.
Pushed. Painfully.
And pushed. Excruciatingly.
And pushed. Agonizingly.
Finally, her head appeared. A head full of dark, beautiful hair.
Next came her shoulders. Small and tiny, very petite.
Then, her body. Thin and slender, the perfect size.
And finally, out she came!
"It's a GIRL," Wren cried, "a beautiful baby girl!"
Right onto Mommy's chest she went for a couple minutes of family time with me and Wren. We held her. We cried with her. And we couldn't believe that this baby is ours. How lucky are we? Truly lucky. She is beautiful and is the perfect combination of Wren, myself, and her brothers and sisters. Her name is Gabriella Lynette. Gabriella is a name I have loved all my life, and now the name belongs to a perfect little love of mine. Her middle name, Lynette, is after Wren's childhood nanny, a woman he admires and adores. Gabriella came home the very next day to a house full of love, where she is loved and adored. We cannot imagine life without our little beauty and cannot wait to see what life has in store for our amazing daughter.
Mommy and Daddy love you, Gabriella!
Monday, March 18, 2013
How Wren and I Named Our Kids
Wow, long time no blog. Things have been very busy because, you know, I just had a baby. But i've really missed blogging and I am going to try and get back into the swing of posting a couple times a week.
One of the things I have always loved about having so many children is naming them. Of course there is so much more I love about having a large family- all the laughs and smiles and hugs- but naming my children has always been special and memorable and heartfelt for me.
With all of our biological children, Wren and I found out their genders before they were born. I am such a planner and have such OCD that I must know for planning purposes. You know, nurseries, outfits, names, etc. But it has been much easier finding out their genders than naming them. I am so glad Mother Nature (is it her? Not sure.) gives Wren and I nine months to pick a name, because if we had less than nine months we wouldn't be able to decide. With some of our pregnancies, naming our children was easy, but with others it was very hard and long. Regardless it was worth the wait!
Naming our adopted children was a little different. Of course the process wasn't the same as being pregnant. I didn't carry Kenyan, Amari, Ira, and Arlet for nine months and I knew in advance whether they were girls or boys. Both of our adoptions (Amari and Kenyan were one & Ira and Arlet were another), were very different and required a different amount of preparation. For example, with the boys we only had three months to prepare, but with the girls we had a year-and-a-half. This means that we had that long to choose their names... or change them if we wanted. Confused? Well, Kenyan, Amari, Ira, and Arlet already had names when we adopted them, but Wren and I were given the opportunity to change them. This is something we really struggled with. Should we give them American names OR should we keep the names that represent where they came from? Eventually we chose the second option and decided to change their middle names to American names. Our biological children have names that honor a family member and represent their history, so we wanted the same for our adopted children; and in this case, this means that honoring their Ethiopian heritage. I am so glad we did this, and whenever I say "Amari" or "Kenyan" or "Ira" or "Arlet" I always think about how special it is that my children have unique names and how much of a privilege it is, through the miracle of adoption, that my four little Ethiopians are magically mine.
Maya is named after her great-grandmother (Wren's grandma) who passed away a year before she was born. Maya was her her first great-grandchild, who she unfortunately never got to meet, so Wren and I felt like this would be the perfect way to honor her great grandmother. Now Maya will always have a piece of her great-grandmother with her, who was a wonderful woman, one that Wren and I hope Maya can grow up to be like- caring, powerful, responsible, and so much more. Her middle name is Caroline, after my mother, whom I also wanted to honor. Now and always, Maya will have a piece of two amazing women in her heart who are inspirational and role models. This is the perfect name for my Maya Caroline!
Kenyan and Amari's biological mother was from Kenya, so that is how Kenyan got his first name. It fits Kenyan perfectly and I am happy he will always have a piece of his biological mother and her history in his heart. Kenyan's middle name is Samuel, after Wren's father. When we told him we were going to adopt a baby (at the time we didn't know we'd be adopting twins), Wren's father suspected that the baby would be a boy. And he was right! Samuel is such a noble, wise man and Kenyan is just like him: very observant, cautious yet adventurous, and a leader. Such a perfect name for my boy. Add the first and middle name together and you get Kenyan Samuel!
When Wren and I found out that our second son's name would be Amari, we instantly fell in love with it. Amari is such a handsome name, and we knew it would fit a handsome little man. He was named by one of his orphanage caretakers who felt the name would suit him, and that it has. Amari means "brave" and this is one of the best words to describe him. Amari lived a very scary life in Ethiopia, one that gave him PTSD when he came home to us in the United States. And not only did he have to be brave in Ethiopia, but he had to be brave when he came home to a new world in the United States surrounded by new people. But Amari has adjusted well and he is now a thriving, strong little man. His middle name is Thomas, after my father. My father has five daughters and always wished for a son, so when he found out that we were adopting two boys he was SO excited. My father has always cherished having two grandsons and he loves my boys so much. He and Amari have always had a special relationship, and I can tell every day that Amari is truly a mini Thomas, just like his grandpa. What a perfect name: Amari Thomas!
When I found out I was pregnant with my second daughter I was absolutely thrilled. There is nothing like being the mother to a little girl; my girls and I just have such a special relationship! Anyways, Gianna was the easiest baby to name! The day Wren and I found out we would be adding a girl to our family, we went out to lunch and started discussing baby names. Ella- no. Ariel- no. Gianna- yes! We walked into the restaurant with no name for our baby and walked out with the perfect name. Next up was choosing her middle name. This was also very easy, especially because we knew we'd be continuing on with the family names. Wren and I chose Katherine after Wren's mother, who we felt would be just like her grandmother. When I was pregnant, Gianna was a very calm baby: she never kicked, I didn't have any cravings or morning sickness, and her birth was so easy. Just like my pregnancy, Wren's mother is kind, calm, and peaceful... and we felt like this would the perfect middle name for our baby girl. Five years later this name is still perfect for my Gianna Katherine!
My third daughter and fifth child's name is Ira. When I first met my daughter in an orphanage in Ethiopia, I had never seen a picture of her and was eager to put a face to the name. All I knew was that her name was Ira. But when I walked into the orphanage and was surrounded by tons of little girls, I knew, just knew, that the little girl with the gorgeous green eyes sitting in the corner was my girl. And I was right! I walked up to her and said "Hi, i'm your Mommy" and she looked up at me and said "I Ira." Ira, what a beautiful name for a beautiful girl. Her name means watchful, and this is perfect for her and fits who she is: a very watchful little girl with very watchful, observant, big eyes. Ira's middle name is Alexandria, after my grandmother. Grandma Ira loved children so much and passed away right before we adopted the girls. She was the first one to tell me "I think you should adopt again" and soon after Wren and I made the decision to do just that. A year-and-a-half later, my beautiful daughter became mine. I love my Ira Alexandria so much!
Elaina was another easy baby to name. Just two years before I became pregnant with Elaina, my aunt passed away in a car accident. I was absolutely devestated and wasn't sure if i'd ever be the same again. My Aunt Elaina was one of my favorite people ever; we were so close and had a very special relationship. Before we found out if we were having a boy or a girl, Wren and I decided to name the baby Elliot for a boy and Elaina for a girl, both in honor and memory of my amazing aunt. Well, at 20 weeks gestation, when I found out I was pregnant with a girl, I began crying at the thought of having a daughter to name after my aunt. This name fits my daughter perfectly, and not a day goes by where I don't think about how Elaina is the spitting image of her auntie. What an honorable privilege! Elaina's middle name is Rose, which is the name my Aunt Elaina, the mother of four sons, had always loved. Such a special name for my special girl, Elaina Rose!
One night I had a dream that I had just given birth to a baby girl named Scarlett. It was a very imactful dream and stuck with me for the next couple months. During the couple months that passed, Wren and I were approved to adopt Ira and another baby girl, who we later found out was named Arlet. When I learned of this, I was shocked. Arlet is the same name as Scarlet, just without the first two letters. Looking back, I realize my dream was a sign that another baby (or two!) would be joining our family within the next year. How amazing! Her name is a type of spice and this is the perfect name for Arlet: a little spice! Arlet is adventurous, sassy, and has a little attitude... she sure is one spicy little girl. Arlet's middle name is Olivia, after the social worker who has helped my family with both of our adoptions. Thanks to her, four beautiful, special, amazing children have joined our family. How lucky are me and my family?! I cannot get enough of my daughter, Arlet Olivia!
As I have mentioned on this blog, my very last pregnancy was the toughest for deciding on a name. Wren and I found out at twenty weeks that we'd be having a baby girl, and dove immediately into choosing a name for her. Little did we know we'd have a very difficult time naming her... as in nine months! We just couldn't agree and probably threw out every single name in the world before we decided on Gabriella. I have always loved the name Gabriella, and all nicknames that come along with it: Gabi, Briella, Brie, etc. When I was pregnant with Maya, Gianna, and Elaina, I asked Wren if we could name the baby Gabriella, but every time he said no. Finally, with this last pregnancy I said, "you know, what if this is our last pregnancy? I love the name Gabriella and would be very sad if after four pregnancies, I didn't get to walk out of the hospital with a newborn named Gabriella... especially after a painful, long labor. Please honey, can we name the baby Gabriella?" and he said yes! But this was after nine months of struggling to figure out a name, so I suspect Wren was just sick and tired of trying to decide on a name. Her middle name is Lynett, after my husband's childhood nanny; who my husband just admires and adores. This baby was born eleven days ago, and it has been eleven days of bliss and blessings with my little Gabriella Lynette!
Well, there you have it! A very long post about how Wren and I came to name our children. How's that for a first post after a blogging hiatus? I love how each of my children are named after special people in our lives. This makes my children even more special! I cannot imagine different names for my babies, and, every day when I say their names, I am reminded of how lucky and blessed I am to be the mother to these eight children.
To me, they are named Maya, Kenyan, Amari, Gianna, Ira, Elaina, Arlet, and Gabriella, but to them I am named Mommy. How special!
One of the things I have always loved about having so many children is naming them. Of course there is so much more I love about having a large family- all the laughs and smiles and hugs- but naming my children has always been special and memorable and heartfelt for me.
With all of our biological children, Wren and I found out their genders before they were born. I am such a planner and have such OCD that I must know for planning purposes. You know, nurseries, outfits, names, etc. But it has been much easier finding out their genders than naming them. I am so glad Mother Nature (is it her? Not sure.) gives Wren and I nine months to pick a name, because if we had less than nine months we wouldn't be able to decide. With some of our pregnancies, naming our children was easy, but with others it was very hard and long. Regardless it was worth the wait!
Naming our adopted children was a little different. Of course the process wasn't the same as being pregnant. I didn't carry Kenyan, Amari, Ira, and Arlet for nine months and I knew in advance whether they were girls or boys. Both of our adoptions (Amari and Kenyan were one & Ira and Arlet were another), were very different and required a different amount of preparation. For example, with the boys we only had three months to prepare, but with the girls we had a year-and-a-half. This means that we had that long to choose their names... or change them if we wanted. Confused? Well, Kenyan, Amari, Ira, and Arlet already had names when we adopted them, but Wren and I were given the opportunity to change them. This is something we really struggled with. Should we give them American names OR should we keep the names that represent where they came from? Eventually we chose the second option and decided to change their middle names to American names. Our biological children have names that honor a family member and represent their history, so we wanted the same for our adopted children; and in this case, this means that honoring their Ethiopian heritage. I am so glad we did this, and whenever I say "Amari" or "Kenyan" or "Ira" or "Arlet" I always think about how special it is that my children have unique names and how much of a privilege it is, through the miracle of adoption, that my four little Ethiopians are magically mine.
Maya is named after her great-grandmother (Wren's grandma) who passed away a year before she was born. Maya was her her first great-grandchild, who she unfortunately never got to meet, so Wren and I felt like this would be the perfect way to honor her great grandmother. Now Maya will always have a piece of her great-grandmother with her, who was a wonderful woman, one that Wren and I hope Maya can grow up to be like- caring, powerful, responsible, and so much more. Her middle name is Caroline, after my mother, whom I also wanted to honor. Now and always, Maya will have a piece of two amazing women in her heart who are inspirational and role models. This is the perfect name for my Maya Caroline!
Kenyan and Amari's biological mother was from Kenya, so that is how Kenyan got his first name. It fits Kenyan perfectly and I am happy he will always have a piece of his biological mother and her history in his heart. Kenyan's middle name is Samuel, after Wren's father. When we told him we were going to adopt a baby (at the time we didn't know we'd be adopting twins), Wren's father suspected that the baby would be a boy. And he was right! Samuel is such a noble, wise man and Kenyan is just like him: very observant, cautious yet adventurous, and a leader. Such a perfect name for my boy. Add the first and middle name together and you get Kenyan Samuel!
When Wren and I found out that our second son's name would be Amari, we instantly fell in love with it. Amari is such a handsome name, and we knew it would fit a handsome little man. He was named by one of his orphanage caretakers who felt the name would suit him, and that it has. Amari means "brave" and this is one of the best words to describe him. Amari lived a very scary life in Ethiopia, one that gave him PTSD when he came home to us in the United States. And not only did he have to be brave in Ethiopia, but he had to be brave when he came home to a new world in the United States surrounded by new people. But Amari has adjusted well and he is now a thriving, strong little man. His middle name is Thomas, after my father. My father has five daughters and always wished for a son, so when he found out that we were adopting two boys he was SO excited. My father has always cherished having two grandsons and he loves my boys so much. He and Amari have always had a special relationship, and I can tell every day that Amari is truly a mini Thomas, just like his grandpa. What a perfect name: Amari Thomas!
When I found out I was pregnant with my second daughter I was absolutely thrilled. There is nothing like being the mother to a little girl; my girls and I just have such a special relationship! Anyways, Gianna was the easiest baby to name! The day Wren and I found out we would be adding a girl to our family, we went out to lunch and started discussing baby names. Ella- no. Ariel- no. Gianna- yes! We walked into the restaurant with no name for our baby and walked out with the perfect name. Next up was choosing her middle name. This was also very easy, especially because we knew we'd be continuing on with the family names. Wren and I chose Katherine after Wren's mother, who we felt would be just like her grandmother. When I was pregnant, Gianna was a very calm baby: she never kicked, I didn't have any cravings or morning sickness, and her birth was so easy. Just like my pregnancy, Wren's mother is kind, calm, and peaceful... and we felt like this would the perfect middle name for our baby girl. Five years later this name is still perfect for my Gianna Katherine!
My third daughter and fifth child's name is Ira. When I first met my daughter in an orphanage in Ethiopia, I had never seen a picture of her and was eager to put a face to the name. All I knew was that her name was Ira. But when I walked into the orphanage and was surrounded by tons of little girls, I knew, just knew, that the little girl with the gorgeous green eyes sitting in the corner was my girl. And I was right! I walked up to her and said "Hi, i'm your Mommy" and she looked up at me and said "I Ira." Ira, what a beautiful name for a beautiful girl. Her name means watchful, and this is perfect for her and fits who she is: a very watchful little girl with very watchful, observant, big eyes. Ira's middle name is Alexandria, after my grandmother. Grandma Ira loved children so much and passed away right before we adopted the girls. She was the first one to tell me "I think you should adopt again" and soon after Wren and I made the decision to do just that. A year-and-a-half later, my beautiful daughter became mine. I love my Ira Alexandria so much!
Elaina was another easy baby to name. Just two years before I became pregnant with Elaina, my aunt passed away in a car accident. I was absolutely devestated and wasn't sure if i'd ever be the same again. My Aunt Elaina was one of my favorite people ever; we were so close and had a very special relationship. Before we found out if we were having a boy or a girl, Wren and I decided to name the baby Elliot for a boy and Elaina for a girl, both in honor and memory of my amazing aunt. Well, at 20 weeks gestation, when I found out I was pregnant with a girl, I began crying at the thought of having a daughter to name after my aunt. This name fits my daughter perfectly, and not a day goes by where I don't think about how Elaina is the spitting image of her auntie. What an honorable privilege! Elaina's middle name is Rose, which is the name my Aunt Elaina, the mother of four sons, had always loved. Such a special name for my special girl, Elaina Rose!
One night I had a dream that I had just given birth to a baby girl named Scarlett. It was a very imactful dream and stuck with me for the next couple months. During the couple months that passed, Wren and I were approved to adopt Ira and another baby girl, who we later found out was named Arlet. When I learned of this, I was shocked. Arlet is the same name as Scarlet, just without the first two letters. Looking back, I realize my dream was a sign that another baby (or two!) would be joining our family within the next year. How amazing! Her name is a type of spice and this is the perfect name for Arlet: a little spice! Arlet is adventurous, sassy, and has a little attitude... she sure is one spicy little girl. Arlet's middle name is Olivia, after the social worker who has helped my family with both of our adoptions. Thanks to her, four beautiful, special, amazing children have joined our family. How lucky are me and my family?! I cannot get enough of my daughter, Arlet Olivia!
As I have mentioned on this blog, my very last pregnancy was the toughest for deciding on a name. Wren and I found out at twenty weeks that we'd be having a baby girl, and dove immediately into choosing a name for her. Little did we know we'd have a very difficult time naming her... as in nine months! We just couldn't agree and probably threw out every single name in the world before we decided on Gabriella. I have always loved the name Gabriella, and all nicknames that come along with it: Gabi, Briella, Brie, etc. When I was pregnant with Maya, Gianna, and Elaina, I asked Wren if we could name the baby Gabriella, but every time he said no. Finally, with this last pregnancy I said, "you know, what if this is our last pregnancy? I love the name Gabriella and would be very sad if after four pregnancies, I didn't get to walk out of the hospital with a newborn named Gabriella... especially after a painful, long labor. Please honey, can we name the baby Gabriella?" and he said yes! But this was after nine months of struggling to figure out a name, so I suspect Wren was just sick and tired of trying to decide on a name. Her middle name is Lynett, after my husband's childhood nanny; who my husband just admires and adores. This baby was born eleven days ago, and it has been eleven days of bliss and blessings with my little Gabriella Lynette!
Well, there you have it! A very long post about how Wren and I came to name our children. How's that for a first post after a blogging hiatus? I love how each of my children are named after special people in our lives. This makes my children even more special! I cannot imagine different names for my babies, and, every day when I say their names, I am reminded of how lucky and blessed I am to be the mother to these eight children.
To me, they are named Maya, Kenyan, Amari, Gianna, Ira, Elaina, Arlet, and Gabriella, but to them I am named Mommy. How special!
Friday, March 8, 2013
Please Welcome...
Gabriella Lynette Kingston
Thursday, March 7th, 2013
5:05am
7 pounds 4 ounces
20 inches long
Beautiful
Healthy
Loved
Perfect
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